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How Much Time Should Couples Spend Together?

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couple time spend together

How Much Time Should Couples Spend Together?

Couple platform, how much time should couples spend together, relationship advises, adoration-evenings – You name it and you will get an instant hit on the head. Some people just freak-out, the moment they hear that they have to talk about relationships, timing, and HELL yes about future.

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I get it, it’s not an easy task, but on the other hand what is it that you can learn and must know? Ever thought about it? Though, I am totally against the “clingy-nature” type thingy but in reality, this might be the only thing to ruin your relationship. Naturally, you have to be in one to get it ruined completely!

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Today’s Talk

Talk about relationships

The other day, I was completing a blog on new ideas about working, marketing and God knows what else. A friend of mine who was inspecting my schedule since morning had the nerve to call out and ask if I have ever written on relationships or something about feelings other than the work I do. And, that got me started to write and complete something on relationships out of nowhere. It’s not like I am against them, it’s just that I never thought about to write in such proximity. I usually work with my brain focused on something which is not entirely related to the relation-psych.

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So, here I am and to pull it out with more success, I had the idea to share it on my social media to understand what people have to say and fee about it. To my surprise, and YES I do mean it with surprise, that this is a whole new world to be explored. I had fun asking one simple question and that got people to share thoughts, feelings, and I had to pen it down.

Questions Aren’t The Only Thing- Are They?

time for dates

So, to begin with some concrete base, I simply thought about what could be more important in any relationship. Guess what? The answer was simple TIME. Time is money, value and if you actually spend it on an individual, then that person must actually own it. The basic question again surfacing is how much time should couples spend together? What’s a fit stretch of time to spend with the person you’re dating?

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We all see those people who focus on diving headlong into a new relationship, spending 24/7 with a new companion, etc.  However, this at times comes at the cost of their other interactions. In the meantime, other people feel like they have to battle their way on to their new partner’s timetable. Isn’t it?

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Couples

Where’s the sense of balance? What is a hale and hearty amount of time to devote on your significant other? How much time should couples spend together? Not to worry, I am here to get in detail on this with some facts and YEAH pictures too, lol!!!

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Couples
how much time should couples spend together

There is no science involved here, let’s try to just figure out the sweet spot first. Achieving a balance is a lot harder than you might think. You are often powerfully bound to spend time with the new, electrifying person in your life. I know those desires you have to get opportunities to be right next to that special someone.

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Well, of course this time together is beneficial and compulsory to nurture your relationship. This also lets you to start interlacing two lives as one.  Nonetheless, your job and life annoys some honest borders on how much time should couples spend together.

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your partner expects different levels of availability

From unforeseen work duties on the weekend to unexpected business travel weights, one partner’s career goals and drives – There are so many! Do you know you can impose strain on your relationship if your partner expects different levels of availability?

Navigation – How Much Time Should Couples Spend Together?

How Much Time Should Couples Spend Together

Man, you have got to navigate your time! This is going to revolve around your time “spent together” with time that is naturally for friends and family. In relationships, your timing with your pre-existing ones will change, and EXTREMELY too! If you take advice from Zimmer-Gembeck research, women who quickly amplify time spent with a starry-eyed partner, more speedily cut the time they spend with their BFF.

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It’s not common for ladies only, I have certain people from the boys group also, falling on the same wheel. When complains from friends or family start voicing daily, then it means BALANCE is much needed!

The Goal Is BALANCE!

balance in relationship

I know, I know! Time spent together is beneficial. You get to understand the other person, their likes, dislike, hobbies all. But then again, how much time should couples spend together? Your job, your friends, your family are equally important, so how to balance it?

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This my friend is a million dollar question, which unfortunately is not answered by any research. The goal, obviously, is to find a balance.

Here are a few tips to help you score some good numbers in all areas!

Accept Your Differences!

amount of time to devote on your significant other

Did you ever get to read opposites attract? You need different levels of time with your partner in a long-term relationship. If we go about with Hazan & Shaver, 1987 – Classic attachment theory research – you will simply whistle-up! Here, they say that people sloping to anxiety in relationships want unlimited time with their partners.

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However, the same research suggests that people focused on escaping, frequently prioritize freedom. Talk with your partners. Ask questions, try to understand what they want, adore and think about. You must accept the individuality of your partner. Your partner is a whole new person. Learn them!

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Listen To Your Friends!

listen your friends

Another research, Sprecher conducted in 2011 – highlights that your friends are your support towards your relationship too. As soon as you start-up with your partner, don’t forget your friends. The minute you get time, plan a girl’s night-out or guy’s time-out.

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Never have your relationship equation empty of your friends. The dictionary of how much time should couples spend together, should also look-out for friends time on the agenda too. Your friends, are your way of getting the steam out. They know you better than you know yourself. So, stick around!

Date Night On The Record!

date night surprise

Plan your date nights. Surprise your partner. Take time to make-up for the stretch your job and obligations took away. Have a movie night or maybe dinners? Show your partner that you care. Buy some special gifts for your girl!

Know The Flow And Drift Along!

Know The Flow And Drift Along

With your relationships, you need to move along the flow. Sometimes are real hard, others just lovely. Don’t let the spark die. Prioritize each thing along the comfy zone. Breath-in and relax, I know that was too much of an information. But again you need to know how to handle and sustain whatever life throws at you.

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Spend quality time with the love of your life and also ensure to brighten-up your personal life too. You don’t have to be clingy or pushy- just give space here and now. Seize each and every option you can to amaze them!

Be In Constant Contact

be constant contact

Cherish your time spent together. WhatsApp, text, video call- you have all you need to show you care. A good morning text will brighten-up your day, so is the case with your love. The goodnight kiss after a date may just have them thinking about you on the long drive back.

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Use social media to let them and your friends know that you are happy. Though, the folks who want privacy, if you only just add-in a simple remark or photo of something you saw together may let your significant other know that deep-down you care. Privacy problem also solved and declaring love also transmitted. Easy? But, don’t get me wrong here, too much contact is also boring. Don’t do that hourly call unless you are travelling or way out of their reach. Don’t text every 20 minutes or so to just ask if you slept or had your lunch.

Invasion Of Privacy

Invasion Of Privacy

According to Dr. Ish Major, a qualified psychiatrist and relationship expert, your partner may not like too much of a contact.  It might look like you are trying to invade into their privacy and they may start to lose interest. It also may look like you are checking-up on them. Give your partner their personal space. If the call wasn’t answered twice, don’t keep-on ringing. Just let them come to you instead of dragging them to you. Relax and have some “ME” time instead.

Because, We Care IS NOT CARE!

bf freaking out

Your PDA is not care, constant nagging is not care, and hourly calls is not care. Isn’t this not evident that you are just trying to freak-out your partner? Trust your partners. Let them have the space they need. If you want to spend some more time then you may want to get introduced to their group of friends.

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Don’t shut them out. Have your special someone know that you care by letting them be free. Don’t judge them while they may be upset or depress. Care is not talking 24/7 but showing with your attitude. Just don’t get tagged-along, let them ask you out!

Be Open

Couples

Your differences or not voicing out issues may be the reason of that sudden silence in your relationship. Have open and honest discussions with your partner. If you are planning for a longer run, then don’t have secrets. See and understand what your partner wants from your relationship. In line with Jay Hurt, relationship coach and author of The 9 Tenets of a Successful Relationship, you need to let your partner know that they can count on you.

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If something is bothering you, don’t just keep it to yourself. If you think your partner’s friends don’t like you or you are not comfortable with their job or anything, just talk it out. Often people drift apart because of NO communication. If you bolt all your thoughts to only yourself, then there is no way your partner will stick around. On the other hand, if it’s a dependency or self-doubt glitch on your ending, you’ll have to grab a separate tactic.

Don’t Ask Before Time

Don’t ask 1000 questions or plan things only your way

Talking things out is good, but what if you are always on the boss mode? Don’t ask 1000 questions or plan things only your way. Your constant bickering is only pointing in this direction and results may not be according to your liking. Am I fat? Did I look fine yesterday?

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Do you like me? Do you love me – Give me a break, are these even to be asked daily? As per research, yes, people do these things, which is why their partners start getting over them. You lose your charm if you are not confident with what you are!

Play With Words

play with words

Though, my complete focus in on the line of how much time should couples spend together, but these things are the basics. It’s not like that the I LOVE YOU, part is changing, no its not. You have to let your partner know that you do love them. Valentine’s day, anniversaries, birthdays, new-year eve, special occasions are spilled in the calendar, so why don’t you use them to declare your love?

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Plan ahead of time. A surprise bouquet, candle light dinner or just some cuddle-time will let your significant other know that you are in love with them. Plan vacations together or do some camping or hiking. Appreciate your lady love by letting them know from your body language that you can’t resist their charms.

Do Things Together

Couples

Now, cut me some slack here. While you are not in to being all Romeo and Juliet, just show with the little things. Pick flowers on your way to her home. Get a coffee from Starbucks, while you know he might be stuck during the lunch break. Do little things for each other, instead of expecting the other way around.

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While, we are at it, but the line between too much time and how much time should couples spend together is kind of tricky. You don’t have to be the obvious timid though. Just let the personal space be there to share. Understand just what is “TOO” much for starters! Spend weekend together instead of 7 days together. Let your partner be not on a constant YOU-CLOCK!

Thrive In Your Relationships

Couples

Weeds develop in a garden if the gardener is not there. Same is the case with your love life. It starts falling apart the moment you start taking things for granted. It is vital to talk troubles and mix-ups instantaneously. More or less, individuals consider good relationships just transpire as in magic. The fact is that a worthy relationship is like everything hard earned thing in your life. You have to invest time and cultivate them daily, but little by little.  The minute, you neglect the relationship it will go down, FAST!!

Change Is NOT On The Road

Did you ever wonder, what is the rout cause of all your fights? It’s the element of TRYING TO CHANGE. Why would you even try that? Is this the reason why you wonder how much time should couples spend together? Being too much in contact will allow you changing your partner’s way of living- like really?

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Well, that’s the main DEALBREAKER guys! Half of your fights, confusions, and worries will disappear the moment you accept each other’s individuality. Guys like to throw things in all directions, whereas girls are usually organized, why fight over the universal truth? Just pick-up your things and organize, try organizing the space and see how the other party will notice.

Myths And Facts

when love fades away

There are huge numbers of myths and facts related to how much time should couples spend together. The one that made me cry was if you’re truly in love, passion will never fade. Wow really? Is this the movie talk or the romantic fantasy love-book quote? Cheers to movies and dreamy novels, we agree that if we honestly love somebody, the passion, chemistry and affection will never go away. In addition, if they do vanish, then it must not be the spot-on relationship. Guys seriously, reality is far from fiction. There is nothing like passion never ebbing away in realism, because honestly it does.  On the other hand, passion naturally shrinks, and you are to blame for it, yes YOU!

Make Your Own Happily-Ever-After!

Couples

Why does it have to be happily ever after only in the movies? If your relationship is truly your sparkling-wish, then you can try adding “happily” in it too. Do you try making it happily day after day? Routine rosters are one of the offenders for your love life, and yes I know it.

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But what exactly do you do to look after it?  As your tasks grow and roles magnify, you have less tempo and strength for your partner. Thus, what to do now? Don’t get all worked-up as I have already expressed that earlier. Now, it’s time for action!

Passion A Real-Time Concern

do adventures

While we are already at a row on how much time should couples spend together, we can’t forget the basic element. Do you know what that is? It’s PASSION! The spark that ignites at the first look, first touch, starts fading away slowly. That’s not because you were away from each other, but because you never tried for each other. You took each other and your “couple” slogan for granted.

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On the other hand this doesn’t mean that the longing is gone for good. Using a little light-heartedness, you can enhance your passion back in-action. Start fresh with new things together, explore adventures as one. Sex is only the bi-product of a relationship, but that doesn’t mean that you have to ignore it. Charm each other. Your emotional connection shouldn’t weave-off the grid just because you were busy. Intimacy is the soul of the heart and you must connect on different levels with each other.

Still What If?

The what if question is real hectic. Come-on guys, think out of the box. If things still don’t work out, does that indicate end? No it surely does not. If you know the other person is and was the one and still matters, then there is no ending. Unless, of course, you already thought about moving-on. Couples therapy is another way of spending time together. It honestly doesn’t point towards trouble in paradise.

Your relationship is really in trouble only if you don’t take the pain. Why suffer, when you know counselling can help you? Why wait for years, when the medicine is right next to you? We are in a digitally shaped world and are already joined with many people and things, but when it comes to our own life, we carelessly toss it aside. Try couple therapy to revive your relationship without losing it.

Conclusion – Be patient!

Picking-up after it may indeed come to you is never the right choice. Issues face-up here and there, but running is not the solution. Your relationship only fails if you stop balancing it from the start. A time well spent and understanding the core of how much time should couples spend together is what you mustn’t miss. Whatsoever the issue is, your partner needs reminding frequently, that you care. Just don’t give-up on each other and try patience as a game changer. I know you will want to write in more on this, and you are always welcome to get in touch with me. Feel free to share your ideas and maybe, together we can write a book on it.

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